Cheese Theologians

Today we are going to learn about a thing called "visual rhetoric."

take a moment and look at the cover of the game... Go on,

What? Too lazy to google? FINE!



this image is courtesy of tombraidergirl.com. Its not a bad site really... Lots of pics and news etc. Check it out. I'm pretty sure it's run by a girl, and as we all know gamer-girls are hot. But I digress)

take a good long look at the art here. Look at what the lines are doing. Think about how the color enhances the focus.

each line is softened producing a Painterly look. This makes Lara seem more feminine and approachable.

the color and light highlight her hair, eyes, and lips presenting a stark, deep brown against a yellow sky. The look in her eyes tells us she is ready for action... Or that she wants to give you a blow job... Its hard to tell... And that's the point.

yes my friends, they aren't marketing this game to our lust for good game play or excellent story; they want us to buy this game with our wangs.

oh yes, Eidos Interactive seems to be dipping into that advertising cesspool of sex appeal like a drunk hits booze on Christmas. "but what about the inside cover? Surely they must have game features listed?" No, it doesnt. This is what you see:



that's right guys, cleavage and spread legs. At least they have taken away the giant knockers Lara used to swing around...

so how good can a game that sells itself on boobies really be?

You'll know when I do.